Do you think a friend or loved one may be suffering from domestic violence?

1 in 3 teenagers, 1 in 4 women, and 1 in 7 men have been a victim of Domestic Violence

Silence Hides Violence

Thank You For Caring and Having the Courage to Start a Conversation!
Starting a conversation is difficult, but if you think someone is in trouble, unsafe, being controlled, abused, or dominated, then speaking up is the right thing to do.

What is Domestic Violence?
Domestic violence is a pattern of behavior used by one person in an intimate relationship to control another through one of the following:

  • emotional abuse/controlling behavior
  • verbal abuse
  • psychological abuse
  • sexual control or abuse
  • threatening behaviors
  • economic abuse
  • physical violence

What are the Signs of Domestic Violence?

  • Is he/she nervous, jumpy, and walking on eggshells?
  • Does he/she seem afraid of their partner or overly anxious to please their partner?
  • Has he/she stopped seeing friends or family, doing the things they enjoy?
  • Has he/she stopped making decisions – leavings them all up to their partner?
  • Does he/she stay in constant contact with their partner throughout the day?
  • Has he/she become anxious or depressed, unusually quiet, and/or lost their confidence?
  • At work, is he/she often tardy, or miss work, get contacted all day by their partner, or have poor concentration?
  • Does he/she have any visible signs – bruises, broken bones, scratches, cuts, bite marks, other injuries (often with unlikely explanations)?

Why People Stay in Abusive Relationships:
Some of these reasons include:

  • Belief  that the abuser will change, that the abuse is their fault or that it is normal.
  • Fear of loneliness, economic hardship, losing custody of children or fear for safety.
  • Isolation from family, friends, community may leave the victim with no self esteem and/or feeling that she/he has no where to go.
  • Love and the desire to keep family together.

How you can start the conversation:

  • Educate yourself about domestic violence – review the Wellspring Website; call Wellspring and talk with an advocate.
  • Tell them you care about them and are concerned about them. Tell them that they are not to blame, and they are not responsible for someone else’s actions.
  • Ask if they are safe
  • LISTEN TO THEM.  Support them by listening and believing.  Let them know it is not their fault.
  • Encourage them to get help. respect their right to decide.
  • Refer them to Wellspring
  • Give them information.  Accept their need to decide when and how they will use it.