Wellspring - Ending relationship and sexual abuse in Saratoga County


News & Events

Back to School 101- Bullying

Bullying. It's a big issue. 74% of 8-11 year olds say bullying happens in their schools. It's in the news all the time...from the positive (e.g., the Dignity for All Students Act and  the 'Be an Ally' campaigns to encourage us all to stand up and speak up) to the negative (e.g, girl on girl bullying and cyberbullying.)

What do you need to know?

  • How can you tell is your child is affected by bullying? Here's an article that covers all you need to look for, 14 Signs that Your Child is Bullied or Being  a Bully.  
  • This is a normal part of growing up... like all stages, this too will pass, right? Nor really. Studies show that the behavior patterns we learn as children tend to 'grow up' with us as we assume more adult relationships. So for both victims and kids with bullying behaviors, there's a greater incidence of dating violence, relationship abuse and sexual violence later in life. 
  • Bullying behaviors may be a gateway to criminal behavior? Wow...that's a reason to take it seriously.  According to the aforementioned 14 signs  article, Some consider adolescent bullying a “gateway” criminal behavior. According to the National Education Association’s position statement on Bullying and Harassment, “Boys identified as bullies in grades six through nine had one criminal conviction by age 24. Forty percent of those identified had three or more arrests by age 30. Bullies are at even greater risk of suicide than their targets. Bullies often grow up to perpetuate family violence.” 
What can you do?
The National Crime Prevention Council has these tips for parents if their child is bullied or is showing bullying behaviors.

Back to School 101- Bullying

Bullying. It's a big issue. 74% of 8-11 year olds say bullying happens in their schools. It's in the news all the time...from the positive (e.g., the Dignity for All Students Act and  the 'Be an Ally' campaigns to encourage us all to stand up and speak up) to the negative (e.g, girl on girl bullying and cyberbullying.)

What do you need to know?

  • How can you tell is your child is affected by bullying? Here's an article that covers all you need to look for, 14 Signs that Your Child is Bullied or Being  a Bully.  
  • This is a normal part of growing up... like all stages, this too will pass, right? Nor really. Studies show that the behavior patterns we learn as children tend to 'grow up' with us as we assume more adult relationships. So for both victims and kids with bullying behaviors, there's a greater incidence of dating violence, relationship abuse and sexual violence later in life. 
  • Bullying behaviors may be a gateway to criminal behavior? Wow...that's a reason to take it seriously.  According to the aforementioned 14 signs  article, Some consider adolescent bullying a “gateway” criminal behavior. According to the National Education Association’s position statement on Bullying and Harassment, “Boys identified as bullies in grades six through nine had one criminal conviction by age 24. Forty percent of those identified had three or more arrests by age 30. Bullies are at even greater risk of suicide than their targets. Bullies often grow up to perpetuate family violence.” 
What can you do?
The National Crime Prevention Council has these tips for parents if their child is bullied or is showing bullying behaviors.

23 + 22 = 121 That’s Right!

Before anyone questions my second grade teacher's abilities, I rocked at math. So what's with the unbalanced equation? We're just  missing some words . Let's try this:

23 business women + 22 minutes= 121 backpacks

That makes more sense.


Today, 23 women from the Chamber of Southern Saratoga County's Women in Business (WIB) Committee  collected  supplies to fill 121 Backpacks of Hope to assist families receiving support  from Domestic Violence and Rape Crisis Services of Saratoga County.
 
 

 

"The Chamber of Southern Saratoga County Women in Business Committee strives to help women both professionally and personally. Supporting DVRC with both Baskets of Hope and Backpacks of Hope every year has been a great partnership – a way we can leverage our connections in the community to gather and provide items DVRC clients so greatly need - and a way we as women feel good about supporting each other. It has also been a fantastic way to bring much needed awareness to this important issue." Wendy Wilms of Cengage Learning and Chair of the WIB.

When  domestic violence  survivors leave the abusive home, they often struggle just trying to provide for their families' basic needs (rent, food, health care.) September can bring overwhelming financial demands as they need to purchase school supplies for one or several children. That's why the WIB has sponsored the Backpacks of Hope project for several years, collecting school supplies  to be distributed by DVRC so that families can focus on what important... building a new life so their children can live in a home without fear and violence.
 
 

"Imagine the trauma of leaving an abusive home with none of your personal items as well as no money and your child needs back to school supplies. With the help of many who gather supplies, giving back to the communities that they live and work in, these children get to go to school with a backpack full of supplies, being able  to just be a kid, without feeling different!" Mary E. Stokes, Stokes Wealth Solutions and WIB member


 

This year, the group assembled 121 backpacks for distribution. The WIB is impressive not only for how much they care, but also how efficient they are. it took just 22 minutes from the moment these women walked in with bags filled with assorted school supplies, to sorting, filling and loading the backpacks up for DVRC to distribute. Those 22 minutes will make such a difference for families struggling to break free from abuse.

If you're interested in helping, it's not too late. You can drop your donations off at the Chamber of Southern Saratoga County located at  15 Park Ave., Ste. 7, Clifton Park.

23 + 22 = 121 That’s Right!

Before anyone questions my second grade teacher's abilities, I rocked at math. So what's with the unbalanced equation? We're just  missing some words . Let's try this:

23 business women + 22 minutes= 121 backpacks

That makes more sense.


Today, 23 women from the Chamber of Southern Saratoga County's Women in Business (WIB) Committee  collected  supplies to fill 121 Backpacks of Hope to assist families receiving support  from Domestic Violence and Rape Crisis Services of Saratoga County.
 
 

 

"The Chamber of Southern Saratoga County Women in Business Committee strives to help women both professionally and personally. Supporting DVRC with both Baskets of Hope and Backpacks of Hope every year has been a great partnership – a way we can leverage our connections in the community to gather and provide items DVRC clients so greatly need - and a way we as women feel good about supporting each other. It has also been a fantastic way to bring much needed awareness to this important issue." Wendy Wilms of Cengage Learning and Chair of the WIB.

When  domestic violence  survivors leave the abusive home, they often struggle just trying to provide for their families' basic needs (rent, food, health care.) September can bring overwhelming financial demands as they need to purchase school supplies for one or several children. That's why the WIB has sponsored the Backpacks of Hope project for several years, collecting school supplies  to be distributed by DVRC so that families can focus on what important... building a new life so their children can live in a home without fear and violence.
 
 

"Imagine the trauma of leaving an abusive home with none of your personal items as well as no money and your child needs back to school supplies. With the help of many who gather supplies, giving back to the communities that they live and work in, these children get to go to school with a backpack full of supplies, being able  to just be a kid, without feeling different!" Mary E. Stokes, Stokes Wealth Solutions and WIB member


 

This year, the group assembled 121 backpacks for distribution. The WIB is impressive not only for how much they care, but also how efficient they are. it took just 22 minutes from the moment these women walked in with bags filled with assorted school supplies, to sorting, filling and loading the backpacks up for DVRC to distribute. Those 22 minutes will make such a difference for families struggling to break free from abuse.

If you're interested in helping, it's not too late. You can drop your donations off at the Chamber of Southern Saratoga County located at  15 Park Ave., Ste. 7, Clifton Park.

Back to School- 101 Drinking and Drugs

You've checked out the sales and bought a closet full of clothes to replace summer's shorts and tank tops. You've dropped a small fortune on spiral notebooks, highlighters, calculators, and backpacks. You've  picked up the books your child needs to read for his/her summer reading assignment. You've been to the doctor for the annual physical and any needed  immunizations. You're talking about making bedtime earlier so they'll be able to get up for the bus on time... but really, it's just to nice to give up those beautiful summer evenings just yet, so let's wait on that one. You're ready, right?

This week I'll be posting about a couple of necessary conversations to have with your kids to prepare them as the school year starts. First, the talk about drinking and drugs. Yeah, you've talked  with them about drugs before and your kids are good kids who know what your values are. Have the talk again. Why? 
  • Think peer pressure is a big influence? There's something bigger... You! Three out of four teens says parents on their #1 influence on their choice whether or not to drink. You may think they're tuning you out, but your values matter to them.
  • September is a clean slate... you can influence what gets written on this slate. Every September is a fresh start in a  new grade, new classes, teachers, and friends. You purchase  daily organizers to foster good study habits and better grades.  Talk about alcohol and drug use too.
  • They're growing up but they're still kids. Adolescent brains are still developing so alcohol and drugs affect them differently and may cause  long-term changes in brain development. Kids may think, 'everybody's doing it, so what's the big deal?' In fact most kids aren't drinking or using drugs regularly. Talk with them so they get the facts and make better decisions.

Back to School- 101 Drinking and Drugs

You've checked out the sales and bought a closet full of clothes to replace summer's shorts and tank tops. You've dropped a small fortune on spiral notebooks, highlighters, calculators, and backpacks. You've  picked up the books your child needs to read for his/her summer reading assignment. You've been to the doctor for the annual physical and any needed  immunizations. You're talking about making bedtime earlier so they'll be able to get up for the bus on time... but really, it's just to nice to give up those beautiful summer evenings just yet, so let's wait on that one. You're ready, right?

This week I'll be posting about a couple of necessary conversations to have with your kids to prepare them as the school year starts. First, the talk about drinking and drugs. Yeah, you've talked  with them about drugs before and your kids are good kids who know what your values are. Have the talk again. Why? 
  • Think peer pressure is a big influence? There's something bigger... You! Three out of four teens says parents on their #1 influence on their choice whether or not to drink. You may think they're tuning you out, but your values matter to them.
  • September is a clean slate... you can influence what gets written on this slate. Every September is a fresh start in a  new grade, new classes, teachers, and friends. You purchase  daily organizers to foster good study habits and better grades.  Talk about alcohol and drug use too.
  • They're growing up but they're still kids. Adolescent brains are still developing so alcohol and drugs affect them differently and may cause  long-term changes in brain development. Kids may think, 'everybody's doing it, so what's the big deal?' In fact most kids aren't drinking or using drugs regularly. Talk with them so they get the facts and make better decisions.

911 to the Rescue

Anyone who responds to crisis calls can relate. When the phone rings you never know what will unfold. All you know is someone needs help, and you're their link. When you're new at it, every time the phone rings (any phone!) your heart rate momentarily bolts like a thoroughbred just out of the gate. So why do people do it... because they care.

Here's a heartwarming story about a 911 operator who saved the day for a distraught bride. I'm sure they didn't cover this kind of assistance in dispatcher training, but her kindness will always be remembered. I hope someone saved her a piece of wedding cake.

911 to the Rescue

Anyone who responds to crisis calls can relate. When the phone rings you never know what will unfold. All you know is someone needs help, and you're their link. When you're new at it, every time the phone rings (any phone!) your heart rate momentarily bolts like a thoroughbred just out of the gate. So why do people do it... because they care.

Here's a heartwarming story about a 911 operator who saved the day for a distraught bride. I'm sure they didn't cover this kind of assistance in dispatcher training, but her kindness will always be remembered. I hope someone saved her a piece of wedding cake.

Looking for New Solutions

Intimate partner violence is nothing new. According to the Colorado Bar Association:

"Women have been speaking out about the assaults that other women have suffered since 1405"... in 1848, in the United States, women spoke out about “male brutality” and later that century Susan B. Anthony helped battered women to escape from their abusers."

 
Our current domestic violence model emerged as part of the women's movement in the 1960s and 70s. It focused on helping female victims to flee abuse and start over. Advocates have helped many victims and undoubtedly saved countless lives. But at a very basic level we've failed. After 40 years:
  • 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men still experience domestic abuse in their lifetimes.
  •  since 2011, total assaults increased by less than 1%, but intimate partner assaults increased by 6% (NYS DCJS)
So we've failed at ending domestic violence. Why?  Domestic violence is a unique crime. I just read an article from Law Enforcement Today that explores how domestic violence is different and why we may need to alter our approach. It covers really salient factors like:
  • Our criminal justice system is reactive; we need a proactive approach to keep domestic violence from escalating.
  • Abusers may appear more likeable or pulled together than trauma-affected victims, thus law enforcement and the courts may have difficulty relating to the victims' decisions.
  • Contrary to most victims of crime, the abuser and the victim have a unique and continuing relationship, "In a cruelly ironic twist, a victim’s physical safety may depend on her (or his—many victims are male) ability to keep the abuser happy. Calling 911 can make a dangerous situation worse, not better."
The article doesn't just articulate the problems, it proposes new strategies for addressing intimate partner violence... and they're cost effective. Maybe it's time to fund some new approaches?
 
 



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