Wellspring - Ending relationship and sexual abuse in Saratoga County


News & Events

Shine a Light 2013-10-05 22:55:00

The recent  murder/suicide in Saratoga Springs is a tragic reminder that elder abuse is a serious concern. One in ten elders is abused, and 90% of abusers are family members. Elder abuse can take many forms: neglect, physical abuse, social isolation, financial exploitation, emotional or psychological abuse.

When a parent is abused by their adult child, they are often reticent to report the crime to authorities, or even to tell anyone. They may:
  •  be worried about their son or daughter
  •  want to protect him/her
  •  be dependent on the abusive family member for health care or transportation,or
  • feel guilty, "I must have done something wrong raising my child for him/her to treat me this way."  
Victims of elder abuse are our most vulnerable citizens (the median age of abused elders is 77.9 years), yet they're often not able to advocate for themselves. That's why it's important that we all know the signs of elder abuse and take action if we're concerned. Don't know what to look for? Click on this post to view an excellent video, so you can recognize the signs of elder abuse.

Shine a Light 2013-10-05 21:55:00

The recent  murder/suicide in Saratoga Springs is a tragic reminder that elder abuse is a serious concern. One in ten elders is abused, and 90% of abusers are family members. Elder abuse can take many forms: neglect, physical abuse, social isolation, financial exploitation, emotional or psychological abuse.

When a parent is abused by their adult child, they are often reticent to report the crime to authorities, or even to tell anyone. They may:
  •  be worried about their son or daughter
  •  want to protect him/her
  •  be dependent on the abusive family member for health care or transportation,or
  • feel guilty, "I must have done something wrong raising my child for him/her to treat me this way."  
Victims of elder abuse are our most vulnerable citizens (the median age of abused elders is 77.9 years), yet they're often not able to advocate for themselves. That's why it's important that we all know the signs of elder abuse and take action if we're concerned. Don't know what to look for? Click on this post to view an excellent video, so you can recognize the signs of elder abuse.

Not always domestic, not always violent

The term domestic violence can sometimes be misleading:
  • Violence conjures up images of a black eye or other physical abuse. Domestic violence covers a range of abusive behaviors, many which do not include physical violence: emotional, psychological abuse, financial control, social isolation to name a few. 

  • For me, just the word 'domestic' conjures up images  of home and family, married relationship. Domestic violence occurs in dating and unmarried couples, same sex couples, and adolescent and elder relationships. It can happen in the home, at school or work, or even via electronic media.
So 1 in four teens reports having experienced abusive behaviors in a dating relationship, but they're probably not thinking of this as domestic violence... and that means they're probably not getting the help they need to be safe. So here's 2 videos created for DVRC by Skidmore students that show what relationship abuse looks like in a dating relationship.
 

 
 


Related posts:
Red Flags of Dating Violence

Not always domestic, not always violent

The term domestic violence can sometimes be misleading:
  • Violence conjures up images of a black eye or other physical abuse. Domestic violence covers a range of abusive behaviors, many which do not include physical violence: emotional, psychological abuse, financial control, social isolation to name a few. 

  • For me, just the word 'domestic' conjures up images  of home and family, married relationship. Domestic violence occurs in dating and unmarried couples, same sex couples, and adolescent and elder relationships. It can happen in the home, at school or work, or even via electronic media.
So 1 in four teens reports having experienced abusive behaviors in a dating relationship, but they're probably not thinking of this as domestic violence... and that means they're probably not getting the help they need to be safe. So here's 2 videos created for DVRC by Skidmore students that show what relationship abuse looks like in a dating relationship.
 

 
 


Related posts:
Red Flags of Dating Violence

You’re a Friend… Be Prepared

For Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I've offered a challenge. Do something, large or small, to raise awareness or help someone affected by relationship abuse.. and I'm offering ideas on what you can do. Today's suggestions revolve around preparing yourself so you know what to do if someone you care about is in need.

I'm often asked why women or men stay in abusive relationships. There are as many answers for that as there are relationships: fear, hoping that something will happen that just makes the abuse end,  concern for breaking a family apart, worry about what will happen to the kids, economics, and love (yes quite simply they love their partner and don't want the relationship to end... just the abuse.)

It's hard (frustrating, and sometimes terrifying) to know that someone you know is in an abusive relationship, but not be able to do anything about it. So what can you do when someone you know is in an abusive relationship?


You’re a Friend… Be Prepared

For Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I've offered a challenge. Do something, large or small, to raise awareness or help someone affected by relationship abuse.. and I'm offering ideas on what you can do. Today's suggestions revolve around preparing yourself so you know what to do if someone you care about is in need.

I'm often asked why women or men stay in abusive relationships. There are as many answers for that as there are relationships: fear, hoping that something will happen that just makes the abuse end,  concern for breaking a family apart, worry about what will happen to the kids, economics, and love (yes quite simply they love their partner and don't want the relationship to end... just the abuse.)

It's hard (frustrating, and sometimes terrifying) to know that someone you know is in an abusive relationship, but not be able to do anything about it. So what can you do when someone you know is in an abusive relationship?


Domestic Violence Awareness Month

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month
 
You guessed it; I'm wearing purple.  Does wearing purple end domestic violence? No. But when people see it, they remember  to talk about relationship abuse with their friends, employees, and children.
 
Sometimes it seems we have a dizzying array months, days, or weeks dedicated to causes.
Some are poignant or tragic:
          Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month (September)
          International Holocaust Remembrance Day (January 27)...
Some are important social issues:
           World AIDS Day (December 1)
           Adopt a Shelter Cat Month (June)  
Some are fun and frivolous:
           Bacon Day anyone ? (August 31)
 
But the reason for dedicating a distinct period of time to a cause is to provide us the opportunity to pause, think and take action to increase awareness. Often we care about an issue, but don't know what we can do to make a difference. Sometimes we're afraid that taking action would require too much commitment so we don't even try.
 
So here's my challenge. Throughout the month, my blog posts will include ideas on  actions you can take to increase awareness... and they'll be short-term and  achievable (you're busy... I get it).
So pick one or two  this month (or if you're an overachiever, pick one a day)... and take the time to do them.  YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE... even with your busy schedule.
 
Why?
  • Because 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men are abused within an intimate relationship.
  • Because domestic violence is the second most common crime in Saratoga County (and the second most common cause of homicide.)
  • Because together we can END relationship abuse.
You could:
Wear purple and tell people why.
Let friends and colleagues know that domestic violence is an issue you care about. Ask the to join you in increasing awareness so we can have a community where no one lives in fear at home.
 
Donate a gift card to DVRC  so we can provide emergency assistance to a domestic violence survivor. 
Gift cards in any denomination from $5-$50 are always appreciated (recommended stores are Stewart’s (can be used for gas), WalMart, Target, Hannaford, Price Chopper, CVS (for needed over the counter medications and diapers). This is an item we welcome throughout the year because we give these to adults as emergency assistance for such items as gas when they are newly employed so they can get to work until they receive their first paycheck and for food when a family first moves out to independent, safe housing. We give these to persons in need to purchase items they may not be able to access otherwise, but  are crucial to their health & safety or transition plan.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month
 
You guessed it; I'm wearing purple.  Does wearing purple end domestic violence? No. But when people see it, they remember  to talk about relationship abuse with their friends, employees, and children.
 
Sometimes it seems we have a dizzying array months, days, or weeks dedicated to causes.
Some are poignant or tragic:
          Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month (September)
          International Holocaust Remembrance Day (January 27)...
Some are important social issues:
           World AIDS Day (December 1)
           Adopt a Shelter Cat Month (June)  
Some are fun and frivolous:
           Bacon Day anyone ? (August 31)
 
But the reason for dedicating a distinct period of time to a cause is to provide us the opportunity to pause, think and take action to increase awareness. Often we care about an issue, but don't know what we can do to make a difference. Sometimes we're afraid that taking action would require too much commitment so we don't even try.
 
So here's my challenge. Throughout the month, my blog posts will include ideas on  actions you can take to increase awareness... and they'll be short-term and  achievable (you're busy... I get it).
So pick one or two  this month (or if you're an overachiever, pick one a day)... and take the time to do them.  YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE... even with your busy schedule.
 
Why?
  • Because 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men are abused within an intimate relationship.
  • Because domestic violence is the second most common crime in Saratoga County (and the second most common cause of homicide.)
  • Because together we can END relationship abuse.
You could:
Wear purple and tell people why.
Let friends and colleagues know that domestic violence is an issue you care about. Ask the to join you in increasing awareness so we can have a community where no one lives in fear at home.
 
Donate a gift card to DVRC  so we can provide emergency assistance to a domestic violence survivor. 
Gift cards in any denomination from $5-$50 are always appreciated (recommended stores are Stewart’s (can be used for gas), WalMart, Target, Hannaford, Price Chopper, CVS (for needed over the counter medications and diapers). This is an item we welcome throughout the year because we give these to adults as emergency assistance for such items as gas when they are newly employed so they can get to work until they receive their first paycheck and for food when a family first moves out to independent, safe housing. We give these to persons in need to purchase items they may not be able to access otherwise, but  are crucial to their health & safety or transition plan.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

The Happiness Highway

We've all been there. So much isn't wrong in your life, yet you're just not happy. Dale Carnegie said,
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing
that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about.”
 
Turns out he was right. Here's research on a very simple way to increase your happiness. It doesn't cost anything. Takes just a couple of minutes. Works best when you're already not happy. And has a ripple effect in making other people happy.
 
The folks in the video were so happy they were crying.
 
Like all things, what you get from it varies upon how much you put into it. So don't just watch the video. Watch it, think about it, do it... and tell someone. I know I've got some words I think but never say that I'm going to share tonight with a couple of people in my life... then give them a big hug.
 
 I'll do it for them,,, for me.. and because the world needs more happiness.
 

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